Awkward day in class

Welcome back to all my loyal fans. Please don't be shy about posting your thoughts, jokes, criticisms, stories, etc... (3 dots)

So today I had an awkward encounter that I would like to share with the public. In school, there are about eighty students in a class, just like in YU. Seating is picked electronically via the Internet, on a first come first serve basis. Not suprisingly, I was one of the last to be served, and got stuck with a seat in the front row, next to the strangest people in the class. Now keep in mind, alot of socializing depends on who u r sitting next to. Those few minutes before and after class are critical moments in which solid friendships can be built. So maybe its good that I'm not sitting next to an attractive, sweet, intelligent girl, b/c who knows where that would end up.
So who am i sitting next to? I am sitting next to a lady. She has to be at least 40 and she just looks like her house smells from mothballs. U know that look. She has some heavy Scandavian accent as well, but I dont know enough about the world to tell u what country she is from. In any event, she is a lady, and I am a little guy, so sitting next to her is strange.

Today I wore my much-heralded argyle sweater. Its my go-to sweater, my "old reliable", the sweater u know u can always turn to in times of dressing-confusion. Well, at least it was. To my horror, old lady next to me is also wearing an argyle sweater. And it gets worse. The Professor stops his lecture in the middle and says.."hey, you guys are twins!!!". Then the lady says."yahh, we should take a family photo, and starts cackling like a drunk witch. I'm thinking, "ummm, when did i enter the twilight zone. I'm telling you, these things only happen to me.

Furthermore, this lady was drinking V8 the entire class. This is a beverage composed of vegetables that should never be turned into juices, like carrots and zuchini. Why is this beverage being sold? Zuchini, and olives for that matter, make me nausuous no matter what form they are in. One time I ordered an egg salad wrap in YU, without realizg there were olives in it. I'm telling you, when I bit into it, I was wretching for 10 minutes. Shouldn't there be some kind of warning on products that have hidden gross ingredients? Fruit also makes me nausous, but that might be genetically inherited from my father. Or it might come from my grandmother's insistance that I eat pear after pear when I was 3 years old untill I vomit. Either way, I am disturbed by most fruit and certain vegetables. And b/c Tu B'shvat has just passed, I felt it was appropriate to discuss all this. And also b/c that old mothball hag was drinking V8. But now she is my twin sister. Great. GN